But How?

Sometimes we are faced with challenges in our lives that make our faith falter.  We want to believe the Universe has our back and will supply everything we need but instead of just trusting, we want to know the “but hows?”  How am I going to pay for this car repair?  How am I going to pay for that doctor bill?  What am I going to do now?  Then we go about trying to force things in the natural when if we just believe, the Universe* already has a plan to work it out for us.

For example, you are looking for the perfect mate for your life.  You know exactly what qualities you want so you go about searching for that person.  You go on dating sights and find a person who is a perfect match according to the sight’s standards.  And all the while, the Universe has been working behind the scenes to facilitate the meeting of you and the “perfect” person for you to meet at the right time, and yet you are accepting societies standards because we are impatient.  I admit I have done this myself.  I had this idea of who I wanted to spend the rest of my life with, my set of standards.  Then I began doubting myself.  Maybe my standards were too high.  Was I expecting too much?  This led me to three very damaging relationships of emotional, mental and physical abuse.  In my quest to be accepted and loved, I settled for far less than what I deserved and received treatment I DID NOT deserve.  It was only when I finally gave up and accepted the fact I was meant to be single (or so I thought), the Universe was able to work it’s magic for me and sent my “perfect man” to me.  It just happened to be my first love, the boy I fell in love with when I was 13 but couldn’t make adults understand then it was our destiny.  Thirty- seven years after my Dad broke us up, the Universe brought us back together 3 years ago and it has been the happiest 3 years of my life.  Since then I have learned to stop asking “HOW” and just trust it to happen.

Now don’t misunderstand me here.  I am not saying we just ask the Universe for something, then sit on our ass and expect it to be handed to us.  When you make a declaration, decision or set an intention, you also have to put action to it.  In the case of the story above, I gave up trying to find love on my own because I realized I had to work on me first.  I was in no place emotionally to be in a committed relationship with anyone.  You first have to love yourself before you can love others.  As I said, I had been through 3 abusive relationships in a span of 6 years and blamed the men for the problem.  I finally realized I was the problem.  I had no self-esteem, no self-love, and because of that, I allowed them to abuse me.  Yes, that’s right, I said: “I allowed”.  No one can do something to us unless we allow it.  If you are angry, it is because you allow yourself to be angry.  If you are sad, it is because you allow yourself to dwell there.  It is okay to feel those feelings, but it is most important to process the feelings and let them go.  Do not dwell in the victim mentality mire.  Don’t worry about the “how’s”, just set your intentions, take action to the best of your ability, be grateful for the things that are going right in your life and trust the Universe to take care of the rest.  The Universe gives you exactly what your thoughts and words ask for.  Practice this week being grateful for the good things in your life.  Dwell on those things.  If it is hard, start with something simple like being thankful for the air you breathe and that your body is so wonderfully made that you don’t have to think to breathe, it just happens.  Then you can build from there.  Do you have a roof over your head at night?  Did you eat something today?  Start with the little things in life and work up to the bigger things.  The more we concentrate on the positive and farther way the negative will go.

Wishing you all a very blessed week!


*When I use the term Universe, I am speaking of whatever Divine power (God, Goddess, Great Spirit etc.) you ascribe to.  We are pagan and believe everyone has the ability to be God or Goddess-like. It is all in how you live your life and how you interact with the Universe around you; humans, animals, plant-life etc.  I believe I am not a human being having a spiritual experience, but a spirit being having a human experience.  It is my mission in life to remember that which I forgot in the process of human birth and my passion is to help others do the same by helping them navigate through the difficulties of life.

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