Blessings Dear Souls,
Yesterday I spoke about letting go. It is one of the hardest things I have ever had to do. I was the girl in school who everybody loved to either pick on or ignore. I was never good enough for the social classes, wasn’t bad enough for the rough crowd, wasn’t physically able to fit in with the jocks, I wasn’t smart enough to hang with the intellectuals. Because of that, I grew up feeling I had to be what others wanted just to fit into the norm of society. I had a parent who made me feel like I was never good enough. I have been in relationships where I was put down, treated like a servant, abused mentally, emotionally, verbally and physically. Metallica’s song, “Broken, Beat & Scarred” and Whitesnake’s “Here I Go Again” had become my theme songs. I have been on a 4-year journey of trying to break free of the fear of being me and who I am supposed to be. I had a HUGE breakthrough last month in several areas where this had affected my life and now I feel so free to be the real me.
I finally realized I was treated the way I was because I ALLOWED IT! I allowed the disrespect because I wanted to fit in. I allowed the abuse because I was afraid to stand up for myself. I finally realized I am a uniquely created individual not meant to fit into the mold others were trying to shove me into. I could not live my life’s purpose because I was not being the person I was meant to be here on this earth. My first step was to forgive, not the people who had wronged me, to forgive MYSELF for allowing them to manipulate me into the situations that caused me pain. Once I did this, the pain disappeared. Now when thoughts of certain people in my life come to mind, the story has changed and I no longer feel the anger, bitterness or pain. That in itself has brought me so much freedom in my soul. Once you have the freedom in your soul, the other areas of your life fall into alignment and life becomes beautiful and amazing!